Baseball roundup and Oddz and Endz!

You know that final game in Teen Wolf, where Michael J Fox decides he doesn’t want to wolf it up for the final game against the Dragons and instead he and his team mates play the championship game as a team instead of a one man show? The movie shows the final game where Fox, Francis from Pee Wee’s Big Adventure and the rest of his team heroically over come huge odds to hang with a team that already beat them earlier in the film 71-12. Add to it the ongoing history between Fox’s character Scott Howard and the star of the opposing team Nick, and you have a classic formulaic 80s sports movie climax.

After the montage (which blatantly shows Fox making the same lay up over and over) he gets fouled by Nick with the game on the line. Will he make the free throws, sending his home crowd into a frenzy and ultimately winning over the pretty blonde girl who until this point was Nick’s girl? Or will he throw up two consecutive bricks, letting his team down and then not be picked by a Division I school because he decided not to be TW for the final game? OF COURSE he’ll make them both. Of course he will. He also won’t pick the pretty blonde girl, instead going over to his semi attractive friend of 10+ years who like the pretty blonde girl was never seen in movies again. Basically what I’m saying is, you knew exactly how it was going to turn out. All the late excitement, the drama, the storylines, it didn’t matter: Scott Howard’s team was going to win. End of story. It’s the end of the 2008 baseball season, and this analogy perfectly sums up the Toronto Blue Jays.

The collective thoughts of Jays fans all across Canada yesterday afternoon was the same: Gregg Zaun still plays in Toronto? Amazingly as it seems, Zaun did play against the Rays and hit a 13th inning grand slam(!?) to extend the Jays winning streak to 7 games in what has to be the most shocking home run in my memory since I served one up to my 10 year old brother in 1996 and he promptly hit it over the house. (I beaned him the next pitch so I got my revenge; also we used a little plastic ball, so he wasn’t hurt too bad). After the ball went over the fence, and Zaun raised his arm in triumph like a super hero, Jays fans at the Skydome went nuts and begun their celebration. Lost in all of this is the fact that while Zaun’s GS was of the walk off variety and must be a season highlight for him (whatever AAA team he plays for next year will be glad to have that once a year spark in their lineup) is that despite the drama and excitement of this winning streak, it doesn’t matter. The Jays will once again not be in the playoffs, so though the last week has been a nice somewhat ending to a mediocre season, it means very little. We know how it’s going to end for Canada’s Team.

That’s not to say that there isn’t a ton of things to be sorted out in the League before September 28. Somebody still has to win the NL West (I really hope the winner has a sub .500 record and goes to the World Series. It would be amazing to hear the cries coming out of Chicago. “They didn’t even win 81 games! It’s not fair! We were the best team for 6 months!!” There are certain things that need to stay the same and the Cubs losing is one of them). Both Wild Cards are pretty much locked in at this point, however the Red Sox and Brewers still have their sights on the Division crown. The AL Central, in a battle of teams nobody seems to care about, (is there a more useless division in all of sports? Does anyone outside out of the cities in that division care at all about them? Name the 2005 World Series champions right off the top of your head. Took a minute to remember the White Sox didn’t it?) is separated by only 2.5 games and the NL East showdown between the Mets and Phillies should go right down to the wire. It’s actually a tough decision for sports fans tonight: Do we watch the Bears and Colts play in Indianapolis as Manning and company open up their new stadium in what is poised to be a 27-3 blowout? Or do they watch the final game of the Phi-NYM series which after today’s afternoon makeup game (rain out yesterday) could close the gap between the two teams to one? It’s like when Frasier went up against Home Improvement in the mid 90s. Oh decisions, decisions.

So with there only being 3 weeks left before the AL and NL Division Series get under way here are seven things I really want to see the rest of the season.

Tampa Bay at Boston 09/08 – 09/10
Boston at Tampa Bay 09/15 – 09/17

Unbelievably these two teams play each other six more times before the end of the season, and then could very well play in the ALCS in October. It’s hard to imagine the Rays having bad blood with any team especially the Red Sox considering they’ve been so bad for so long (it’d be like this huge beef between Martin Prince and Ralph Wiggum; there just shouldn’t be any reason they should ever have any common ground to fight over) but there is definitely something going on between these two teams and the next week and a half should be dynamite baseball watching. It’d be nice to see Kevin Youkilis get thrown at by someone other than Joba for once.

White Sox at NYY 09/16

This won’t be the day that the Yanks are 100% eliminated from post season play, the first time Derek Jeter will miss the postseason, but this should at least close the coffin. It will be nice not having to listen to Joe Buck and Tim McCarver talk about the ghosts of Yankee Stadium this fall. Also, I’m really hoping that frustration spills out of the clubhouse and Jeter and A Rod get into a heated debate over who was better Mariah or Madonna. (it’s gotta be Mariah doesn’t it? Even if the was crazy at the time? It’s a no brainer right?)

Josh Hamilton

Now that Carlos Quentin pulled a Gus Frerotte and injured himself to end his season, the door is open for Hamilton to regain the HR crown, which would not only cement his “Comeback Player of the Year” award, but also give him two jewels of the triple crown, despite having only 30 RBI’s since the All Star break. Call it the Alex Rios syndrome. It’d be a nice ending to the story if he could hit six down the stretch and become the AL HR Champ.

Adam Dunn making it into the No 4 position, giving the Diamondbacks 3 of the top 4 whiffers in baseball.

Somehow, Arizona ended up with guys who can strike out. Going into the last 3 weeks, the number 2, 3 and 5 leaders in batting K’s come from the same lineup, and this lineup could actually make the playoffs! Nobody is going to catch Ryan Howard, as he’s 40 up on No 2, but it would still be a landmark way to end the campaign. Does Elias even know the last time this happened?

NY Yankees at Toronto 09/23 – 09/25

Not just on TV, but at the ballpark. This is the last home series of the season for the Jays and it couldn’t come against a more fitting opponent. I urge all of you, if you have a chance, pay 9 bucks and go down and slurp one of these games up. I just want to be there when the entire crowd belts out a rendition of “The Mediocre Polka”. Look for zero Yankees fans to attend these games. Ya’ll got nothing on us this year!! (it’s taken 15 years but that actually felt pretty good to say)

F Rod getting his record breaking 58th save of the season, passing Bobby Thigpen.

It’s almost a foregone conclusion that it is going to happen. Rodriguez is at 54 and the Angels have 20 games left. Here’s how I hope it happens. Friday September 26th against Texas he’s still stuck on 57 and time is running out. It’s the top of the 6th and LA is up 8-0 and Rodriguez is pleading with his manager to send him out there to get the last 8 outs of the game, which would give him save number 58, thus breaking the record. Scioscia gives in and F Rod goes out and throws 65 pitches, getting the save but rendering him useless for the entire ALDS against the Red Sox! What a story that would be. It would be like when Bob Sura intentionally missed a shot to grab his own rebound thus giving him a third straight triple double! Like a wise man once said, there maybe no I in team, but there definitely is a “me”.

Chicago Cubs at Milwaukee 09/26 – 09/28

Unless the Brewers keep losing, this series should be the showdown to anoint the NL Central crown. It’ll be the hottest ticket in baseball that weekend and could even mean the loser is out of the playoffs (although the Wild Card winner more than likely will come out of the NL Central). Hopefully CC Sabathia goes out that weekend and in the biggest game of the season gets shelled. Something like 1 1/3 IP, 9H, 8ER, 1 SO and 2BB. That would end all this Cy Young talk and give it to Webb where it belongs. Also, there is a ZERO percent chance the Cubs sweep the Brew Crew in Milwaukee again.


Odds and Ends

Tankapolooza update!

The Maple Leafs and Panthers were finally able to finalize their trade this past week, with the Panthers sending Mike Van Ryn to Toronto for Bryan McCabe and a 4th round draft pick. This is further evidence that Tankopolooza is real. I mean, really?! McCabe for Van Ryn wasn’t enough? Florida needed the Leafs to throw in a draft pick as well? The Panthers are getting a top 2 defenceman who has been at the very least an alternate captain everywhere he has played and giving up a guy who has been a career bust and scored less than 20 points last year and still that wasn’t good enough. This is like a lunchtime trade where one guy gives up his dried apricots for a twix bar but also wants money to buy more dried apricots later. Fletcher was desperate to make his team worse, and this just cements it. Well played by the crafty veteran GM.

NBA News!

The Seattle I mean, Oklahoma basketball team finally unveiled their new nickname it it’s the Thunder. An interesting choice, however at least they didn’t just keep the old nickname and transfer cities like some other teams have done. The LA Lakers? The Utah Jazz? The New Orleans Hornets doesn’t sound as bad because by the 90’s teams had stopped putting a ton of thought into their team’s nicknames. The Thunder though? Calling a team a sound which scares little kids might sound like a good idea, but its not that menacing a name (although its not the worst name in sports by any stretch, that distinction still goes to the Minnesota Wild). This nickname should’ve been introduced 15 years ago, and then Dikembe Mutumbo would have HAD to play for the Thunder, because if thunder could talk, you know it would sound just like him. “You don’t get to shoot the ball over me ok!”

A New Book?

Seriously, we as a society have reached the point where we are officially finished caring about any and everything that has to do with not only Britney but her family in general. Now her mom has a tell all book coming out and we’re supposed to be interested that Brit lost her V card when she was in 9th grade to some guy she was supposedly in love with. It’s done, the love affair is finally over. Now we can finally put to rest that the family was not anything more than a white trash group from the deep south, no different than the 16 year old somewhat skanky girls who attend the county fair in Wallaceburg. Britney porn video: it’s the last logical thing to happen. We’ve been waiting 7 years for it, it’s gotta be coming!

Michael Phelps on SNL!

It’s confirmed. The season premiere of SNL will have Michael Phelps as its host. Although season premieres of the show are usually awful (LeBron James or Steve Carell anyone?) sometimes they work (Dane Cook). Hopefully Phelps will be more like Peyton Manning and less like LeBron, although he’d be hard pressed to top the greatest athlete skit of all time: Joe Montana’s role as Sincere Guy Stu in 1986. There HAS to be a way to view this online by now. HAS to be!


Ok everybody, this is a huge day for sports fans: 13 NFL games, some meaningful baseball games, and my boy Rafa playing the rest of his US Open semifinals today at 5. I’m off to check it out. Enjoy Week 1! GO TRAMPOLINE BEAR!